Legally Rambling (9/24/2009). So what’s up with lawyers and their legal pads? As many of you know, my identical twin brother also happens to be my law partner. This question occurred to me the other day while visiting McMansion de Wright (otherwise known as my brother’s house). As my brother and I sat discussing some arcane legal topic (which we always do), in between us on the table sat a pristine Mead Cambridge (known by its common name – a legal pad). He looked at the pad, I looked at the pad, and we both looked at each other. I thought at the time, a moment reminiscent of the classic 1952 Gary Cooper movie High Noon. And, at the height of that moment, with silence hanging in the air, my brother uttered the phrase “don’t even think about it.” And, just like Joe (the Bartender, of course) in that same move, I thought, “It takes a pretty smart man to know when to back away.” I backed away. You don’t mess with a lawyer and his legal pad. We are so protective of our legal pads.
So why are we so protective? Is it that we are all like Linus van Pelt? Do we sport our yellow legal pads during the work day instead of a blanket? Is the pad protecting us like some sort of paper shield? I mean you have to have one for a meeting, right? Just try walking into a meeting without one. Your partner, associate, or client will stare you down. You know, you just know, what they are thinking - “Hey buddy aren’t you going to take any notes?” “I deserve notes!” “I deserve a pad, I’m important.” Try telling them I don’t take notes - I have a photographic memory. Right! It’s just not the same. How many delayed meetings start with the phrase “I have to get my pad.”
God forbid that someone in your office should lose one. It’s a show stopper pure and simple. Think of the billable time lost looking for these things. I mean if you really want to mess up your partner’s day, just misplace his legal pad. If you are a legal assistant just forget to send one to court with your lawyer, just once! The vary act of failing to send a pad with your lawyer to court is guaranteed to put said lawyer in a bad mood for the rest of the day.
Furthermore, if one is lost, just try to replace it. In most offices you can never find a new one in the supply room. Sure you can find these half used pads, mangled pads, or ones that have three sheets of paper left in them. Who puts these pads back anyway? Obviously, the guy who takes the new ones, because it makes him feel better just knowing that a pad is available for the rest of us. Or just try asking another lawyer for one, it’s like asking for directions to the Lost City of the Incas. Your request will be met with a blank stare.
And, think of the efforts that lawyers go to distinguish their legal pad from a coworker’s pad. It is the legal equivalent of Pimp My Ride. You tear off the cover; mangle the metal ring, color all over it. Your pad has to look unique so that you can distinguish it when you park it on the big table next to all the other pads. You have to protect your pad. Some lawyers are even attached to their pads when they cease to be useful, creating a virtual legal pad necropolis in their office with stacks and stacks of used pads. Why can’t we part with these things?
In short, I have no answers for this issue, only questions, but I have my pad. So, don’t trash my pad, don’t touch it, in fact, don’t even think about it. It’s my pad! Ramble on!
So why are we so protective? Is it that we are all like Linus van Pelt? Do we sport our yellow legal pads during the work day instead of a blanket? Is the pad protecting us like some sort of paper shield? I mean you have to have one for a meeting, right? Just try walking into a meeting without one. Your partner, associate, or client will stare you down. You know, you just know, what they are thinking - “Hey buddy aren’t you going to take any notes?” “I deserve notes!” “I deserve a pad, I’m important.” Try telling them I don’t take notes - I have a photographic memory. Right! It’s just not the same. How many delayed meetings start with the phrase “I have to get my pad.”
God forbid that someone in your office should lose one. It’s a show stopper pure and simple. Think of the billable time lost looking for these things. I mean if you really want to mess up your partner’s day, just misplace his legal pad. If you are a legal assistant just forget to send one to court with your lawyer, just once! The vary act of failing to send a pad with your lawyer to court is guaranteed to put said lawyer in a bad mood for the rest of the day.
Furthermore, if one is lost, just try to replace it. In most offices you can never find a new one in the supply room. Sure you can find these half used pads, mangled pads, or ones that have three sheets of paper left in them. Who puts these pads back anyway? Obviously, the guy who takes the new ones, because it makes him feel better just knowing that a pad is available for the rest of us. Or just try asking another lawyer for one, it’s like asking for directions to the Lost City of the Incas. Your request will be met with a blank stare.
And, think of the efforts that lawyers go to distinguish their legal pad from a coworker’s pad. It is the legal equivalent of Pimp My Ride. You tear off the cover; mangle the metal ring, color all over it. Your pad has to look unique so that you can distinguish it when you park it on the big table next to all the other pads. You have to protect your pad. Some lawyers are even attached to their pads when they cease to be useful, creating a virtual legal pad necropolis in their office with stacks and stacks of used pads. Why can’t we part with these things?
In short, I have no answers for this issue, only questions, but I have my pad. So, don’t trash my pad, don’t touch it, in fact, don’t even think about it. It’s my pad! Ramble on!
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